~ 30 August 2005 ~

Yet Again, The World’s Oldest Person Dies

For at least the fourth time in two years, the world’s oldest person has died. Hendrikje van Andel-Schipper, from the Netherlands, died today at the age of 115. Long time readers of this blog will remember that TruePravda keeps a close watch on this global conspiracy of death.

I think I am beginning to understand the key to these hypergenarians’ downfall: they die soon after they share their secret to longevity. This was Ms. van Andel-Schipper’s secret:

She advised others who wanted a long life to “keep breathing” and eat pickled herring, a favorite Dutch snack.

Somebody better warn this lady to keep quiet.

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1 Comments:

  1. David Marcoe » 8 September 2005:

    There is actually a center that keeps track of people 100 and older (I forget the name). They find that there is a sort of “barrier” at around 115 where the vast majority kick the bucket after persisting so long.

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