4 January 2007 
Checked Out
Are libraries becoming obsolete?
Meme’s the word
The Jollyblogger has been meme-ing about, and I’ve been tagged. I hereby oblige:
Five(ish) things about me:
1. What’s the most fun work you’ve ever done, and why?
Since fun is the operative word here, I’d have to go with my one-day stint as a garbage collector. It was the the day after Christmas, I was in college, and I knew I didn’t have to go back the next day.
2. A. Name one thing you did in the past that you no longer do but wish you did?
Lift weights. (You couldn’t tell?)
B. Name one thing you’ve always wanted to do but keep putting it off?
Write a novel. (yeah, I know)
3. A. What two things would you most like to learn or be better at, and why? (two sentences max)
Thinking more clearly and creatively.
Putting the aforementioned thoughts into words.
B. If you could take a class/workshop/apprentice from anyone in the world living or dead, who would it be and what would you hope to learn? (two more sentences, max)
Dostoevsky, from whom I would like to learn the aforementioned skills.
4. (A) What three words might your best friends or family use to describe you?
Sarcastic
Goofy
Pensive
(B) Now list two more words you wish described you…
Kind
Sarcastic
5. What are your top three passions?
Learning
Teaching
Creating
6. Write–and answer–one more question that YOU would ask someone.
What moves you?
The relieving fact that I am not the end–that there is something, someone bigger than me.
Subtext Message
Richard B. Woodward on the Saddam execution video: “[it] proves again that no act is too gruesome or intimate that someone won’t try to take a picture of it and share it with the wired world. We better get used to living without visual boundaries — and with the curiosity and flexible morality of the viewer as the only limit on what we can see — from now on.”
2 January 2007
2007 Prognostications
I’m neither a prophet, nor the son of a prophet. If I were, these would be my predictions for 2007:
- Britney Spears will introduce a new underwear line that is certified child labor–free. As a matter of fact, “Invisible” — as the line will be called, will be labor–free altogether.
- Against my better judgment, I’ll become a Washington Nationals fan.
- Gov. Mitt Romney will become the frontrunner for the Republican 2008 presidential nomination, and Sen. Barack Obama will be the Dem’s early hyped hope. Former California gubernatorial candidate Gary Coleman will enter the race with a strong showing as an independent, and will hint at a Todd Bridges VP nod.
- Novelist Dan Brown will release a new bestseller called The Bar Code, in which he claims that UPC codes are “the mark of the beast.”
- The telegraph and fax industries will merge in an attempt to give the Internet a run for its money.
- Contrary to hype that we’ve all heard before, a new Indiana Jones movie will not be filmed this year.
- Donald Trump and Rosie O’Donnell will settle their public publicity feud once and for all in WWE cage match in Atlantic City. Trump will be pummeled like a trailer park in a tornado.
- In June, postmodernists — having become institutionalized — will break off and become post–postmodernists. By August, they’ll have realized the double-negative and revert to once more being called modernists.
- In the same vein, the “emerging church” will see the need to emerge from itself. This new movement will be known as the “splurging church,” and it will teeter on the verge of bankruptcy.
That’s my prognostications for 2007. I hope you’re not keeping score…
1 January 2007
Bloomin’ Onion Football
Groan. After a lackluster game which proved the referees as the only stars of the game, Penn State claimed the much-coveted Outback Bowl title. Presumably, there will be a steak named after the winning team.
OK, maybe not, but neither the Vols nor the Nittany Lions looked like they had the proverbial “eye of the tiger.” The Tennessee defense made a couple of good stops, but Johnny Chavis has a lot of work to do from now until September. The offense, amidst its stable of powerhouse talent, still lacked the coalescence that’s needed for an offense potent enough to contend for a BCS bowl, or an SEC Championship at that.
That said, 9–4 is still better than last year’s (oh, what was last year’s record?). Next year could be a banner year for the Vols (please stay Robert Meachem!), but Warden Fulmer first needs to instill a bit of discipline on some of his more cantankerous inmates — I mean, players. So Happy New Year Volunteers! Here’s to a Big Orange 2007!