Why I’m not voting in this Tuesday’s election (it’s not what you think…)

I’m not voting on Tuesday.

Why am I sitting this one out? If you believe various media, pundits, and politicians, you might think that it’s because as an evangelical Christian, I’m disillusioned with the Republican party’s failure to deliver on a number of important issues. Therefore, I’m staying home from the polls this year.

Or, maybe it’s because of the conflagration of scandals that have beset the anti-left as of late. Let’s see what we have to work with:

• The Rep. Mark Foley congressional page scandal
• David Kuo’s revelation that Republican elites disdain evangelicals
• The Jack Abramoff scandal
• The Ted Haggard gay prostitute scandal
• The Aaron Burr — Alexander Hamilton duel

After all, I am one of those fickle evangelicals who sits at home on election day playing rock-paper-scissors in order to decide whether or not to go vote. Surely one of these scandals has convinced me to stay home. Right?

Or maybe it’s just that I’m not that into civic-minded things and need MTV to come “rock me” into voting?

All the above reasons are, of course, wrong. The simple fact is that, being a new resident in Virginia, I missed the registration deadline by a couple of days. I registered within a black-out period which makes me ineligible to vote in this week’s election. The sad thing is that I would have been eligible the first time I went to the DMV, but the Social Security computers were down. Unable to get my license that day, it didn’t occur to me that I may have been able to still register to vote. But I digress.

The bottom line is that I have to sit this one out, and it is a sore point with me. It’s like being on the disabled list when the rest of your team is out playing for the championship. So to continue with the sports analogy, I leave you, my readers, with this exhortation:

Go out and win one for the Gipper.